I don’t know you, but I do know that you are living my worst possible nightmare. I heard through a retweet, who heard through a retweet, who heard through a retweet, that your husband died suddenly from a massive heart attack. And now, although I’d never before heard your name and never had the chance to know your husband, I am consumed with grief. And fear.
Your Twitter stream has left me shaken. There you were, just days before your family vacation, canning marinara sauce and tweeting. And then, suddenly, “He’s gone. And my heart is shattered into a million pieces.” It’s grief in real time. It’s too much for even a stranger to handle, and all I can think of is how…how could you even find the strength to write those painful words?
Today you posted a video called “The Last Dance.” I clicked and saw a still of your husband holding one of your children. I couldn’t watch. I had to turn away, again consumed with grief on your behalf. And again, fear.
Like you, my husband has given me the three greatest gifts in the world. My two children and the very key to my self. And now, you are living the nightmare that every wife and mother dreads. I always wonder, if it happened to me, would I have seen it coming? Would I have said goodbye? Said I love you? Given one last kiss? Would I even have the strength to get out of bed and start another day? I don’t know. I just don’t know.
But I can see from your Twitter stream that you are a woman of strength and of humor. I see that you have a love of life, family and home. As I sit here crying for you, a woman I have never met, I have to believe that these things will see you through this tragic time.
So, @JenniferPerillo, although I don’t know you, and even though you are technically nothing more than an avatar to me, I send you every good wish I have in my soul. And tonight, in honor of the memory of your husband, I will remember to tell mine that I love him, and I will hold him tighter than ever.